Reconciling inner Feminine- inner Masculine
For most part of my life I’ve felt a disconnection from my “masculine” qualities, as if I was lacking support from my “solar” archetype.
When life threw me into situations I needed to protect myself, I felt inadequate in my ability to act on the spot and honor my boundaries.
Instead, most of the times, I remained emotionally numb, unable to utter a single word.
My inner Masculine had been confronted with fear, suspicion and lack of trust.
A part of me- the warrior part- felt angry, ashamed and castrated, as I selectively identified with those qualities inside myself that made me appear sweet, soft and loveable.
I had exiled those other parts that would possibly intimidate others, or even make them feel uncomfortable in my presence.
My inner marriage had been an unhappy one, filled with rage and discontentment.
Contentment was to be searched for on the outside- waiting for “the one” to complete me, put me out of my misery, satiate my thirst for connection.
Five years ago, after many deceptions and fantasies, and after a series of events, I had received an invitation to celebrate my inner Sacred wedding on the chapel of Archangel Michael in Corfu.
The time was ripe, asking me to reconcile those polarities, healing the separation within. In the presence of beautiful priestesses and priests in white, accompanied by songs and flowers, I read my vows to myself.
I committed to always honor the Woman that I am.
To have patience with all the orphan parts of myself.
Commit to my Truth.
Honor the prayers of my Soul.
Allow my voice to be heard.
A new Paradigm had started to emerge…
When our Feminine and Masculine dance on equal terms inside us, when we find security in this primal relationship with ourselves, we start to experience real contentment in life.